28 Weeks - New Low

Let's play a game called find my feet.

I know I have said it before, but who are these people who LOVE being pregnant?  I Love that I have a healthy baby girl growing inside me.  I Love the idea of my family growing.  I Love that Logan and I are going to be parents soon.  But I just Don’t Love being pregnant.  Every week there is something new to overcome thanks to the fat suit I am wearing.  This week’s challenge:  tying my shoes.  Yep, that happened.  I can no longer sit in a chair, bend over and tie my shoe by myself.  The thing that I never get used to is the fact that this belly of mine is solid.  It is a good thing, I know.  There is a baby in there not just a bunch of cheeseburgers.  But that means I can’t suck it in when I’m trying to get through a crowd and I can’t squish it down when I try to bend over to put on some running shoes.  (Let’s be serious though, they might be called running shoes, but there is no running happening.)

The other thing I can’t get used to is how many breaks I need to take.  Cooking is a love of mine and I do a lot of it during the holiday season.  It took me 3 times as long as it would normally to do my normal preparations, which really threw me off.  I get so tired so quickly and my back starts to hurt with very little effort.  It seemed like every 15 minutes I was heading to the couch with a big bottle of water to take a breather.  Not to mention that it is only 68 degrees in my house and I’m dripping in sweat from the little activity I just did.  It makes me realize how much I use to take for granted.  Thank goodness for my sweet husband who normally does everything possible to avoid the kitchen for stepping in and helping out.  Otherwise I would have been in the kitchen until 2 a.m. hating life.  Something that I always enjoyed is now a hassle.  It is moments like that which make me wish I could fast forward to 3 months from now. 

A lot of good happened this week though so I can’t complain too much.  I had the best Dr. Appointment yet.  I think this is the first time that they have not told me that I am gaining too much weight.  Actually, I measured exactly where I should be.  I am 28 centimeters and 28 weeks which was perfect.  BGB’s heartbeat sounded awesome and she has been kicking up a storm.  I also put together a nice long check list of things that need to happen before her arrival and have a lot of things crossed off it already.  This might be the first time in months that I’m not feeling overwhelmed.  Great timing too since this will be a hectic week of running around and visiting with family over Christmas.  So no, I don't love what being pregnant is doing to me physically, but I do love what being pregnant means for my family.  I love the connection that is developing between me and this little girl and I am really counting down the days until I get to meet her.

Week 27: Tis the season… to freak out

This happens every year.  In the blink of an eye lazy summer days are over and you are sitting down with your family for Thanksgiving then running around like a crazy person getting things together for Christmas.  Each year that passes feels shorter and shorter and it feels like there is only a week between Thanksgiving and Christmas rather than a month.  So you can only imagine how I feel to have the normal holiday pressure with the added physical weight and lack of mobility of this baby sitting on my bladder causing me to run to the restroom every half hour and creating endless back pain.  Oh yea, and I am now in my third trimester which means that I only have about 80 days left before baby girl makes her appearance into this world.

I feel like the checklist of things to do before D-Day is constantly growing without me crossing anything off the list.  Plus everything was put on hold to do just the normal day to day stuff that happens this time of year.  Christmas shopping, work, decorating, holiday parties, etc.  I’m not trying to complain – these are all fun activities and I don’t want to skip out on them, but each obligation in my day means one more day to push off the other responsibilities that I have.  Setting up the nursery, taking the classes at the hospital, setting up an appointment with the pediatrician, etc.  What I would love is for time to stop for about a week.  In that time I can sit in a cozy chair, snuggled up with a cup of hot chocolate enjoying this amazing week Florida gets once a year where it is cold enough to wear a sweater and reflect on what the Christmas season is all about.  I get so caught up in the consumerism side of the holiday that I forget to reflect on the amazing gift that gives me a reason to celebrate this joyous day each year.  But alas, I don’t have the super power to stop time so I will just have to make an effort to make the time to have a little quite moment to be still in reflection. 

Logan and I did get a short moment to spend in reflection of all the accomplishments we’ve had over the past year and what we have to look forward to in the year to come on Saturday night.  He just finished a big project for work that his boss rewarded him for with a date night out with his wife.  So for the first time since being pregnant, I got all dolled up for a night on the town.  It didn’t hurt that we did a maternity shoot earlier that day so I already had my nails and make up looking good.  I found a dress that didn’t make me feel like a manatee, threw some curls in my hair and let my man wine and dine me.  The whole time I couldn’t help but think about how much our life is about to change.  These date nights are going to be few and far between.  Some people might see it as depressing that my night is ending at 9 on a Saturday and I’m looking forward to getting a good night’s sleep vs. the days where I didn’t start getting ready to go out until 9.  Or that I’d rather spend a Friday night after a long week of work in my PJs sitting on my patio with a glass of wine then listening to a local band at a bar.  But these are changes that we are ready for and are excited about.  Besides, if a fancy date night or a night out to the bars becomes a rare occasion rather than a weekly norm, we might actually appreciate and remember those experiences vs. just being a part of the blur of the past year that always overcomes me right around Christmas.  

26 weeks – Babies for Dummies

This was a big week for taking next steps in the pregnancy to get ready for Little Miss BGB.  Logan and I attending our first ‘pregnancy class’ where we learned all about how to take care of newborns.  I believe the official name of the class was just Newborn Care but it could have been called Newborn Care for dummies.  I loved it.  They did not over complicate things and they went over everything you could imagine from changing a diaper to bathing and included great handouts that broke everything down step by step.  It was painfully long (3.5 hours) but went by surprisingly quick.  The thing that I enjoyed the most about the class was it was a visual reminder of all the stuff I have already been reading in my mommy-to-be books.  I left feeling more confident that I know what to do when BGB makes her grand entrance. 

Bad Photos - But Progress Being Made!

Another great moment was that Logan was finally able to start his nesting process.  He has been very productive with getting the nursery ready.  We have a crib assembled and a hutch that has been painted.  Now we just need to find a dresser and put together the glider and all the basics will be complete.  Between that and feeling her movements have started to make a big connection between us and our new family.  We are much more aware of her and are beginning to think about how any decision we make will be impacted by her.  Things like going away for the night on Saturday to the Don CeSar can’t happen on a whim anymore.  Everything from working late to wanting to grab some dinner will need to have BGB in consideration.  People say that having a dog helps prepare you for that, but maybe we just have the world’s easiest dog because that has never been an issue for us. 

Taken at Don CeSar

I’ve also made huge strides in completing my registry.  I realized that I am overthinking things because this registry has taken me over a month to do.  I couldn’t add something to the registry until I did research to see which one is the best and has the strongest reviews.  What kind of parent would I be if my little princess didn’t have the top rated set of plastic keys?  It was getting a little crazy.  So after I did a few more reviews of ‘review-worthy’ items like car seats and baby monitors, I went the girl-rational route.  If it was the cuter option, I picked it.  This is supposed to be the fun part right?  Picking out all the sweet little outfits should be a fun process not stressful.  So in my last week of the second trimester, that is what we did.  We had fun playing house while we wait for the big day.



Week 25 – A quiet moment of thanksgiving

If I have one complaint about the pregnancy experience so far it wouldn’t have anything to do with side effects.  Heartburn – bring it on.  Nausea – so what?  Emotional Breakdowns?  You’ll be a good laugh later.  No, my one complaint is the worry I’ve felt about this sweet child and fear of the unknown.  What could I be doing right now that could be hurting her?  What could I be doing better?  So with the Thanksgiving Holiday finally here, I decided it is time to shut out the negative and to spend a quiet moment of personal thanksgiving for all the wonderful things that I have going for me.  So here is my short top 5 list of things I am most thankful for when it comes to BGB.

Mallory says Happy Thanksgiving!

5.  Regardless of some of my ‘pregnancy side effects’ I have had an easy pregnancy without any serious complications.   I am thankful for my health.

4.  My mommy friends.  I am not the first girl in my circle to have a baby and I am so thankful to have these amazing women to lean onto for advise and support.  Their wisdom has been invaluable.    

3.  My supportive husband.  Logan has stepped up in a way I couldn’t have even imagined.  He has been more supportive, patient, and understanding than I could have dreamed.  I don’t know how women go through this without that support, but I tip my hat to them and have the most respect because I don’t know if I would be that strong.

2.  Thanksgiving Day reminded me that we do have a village to help raise this child.  There is a reason why we stayed in Tampa and it gives me a lot more confidence with having this baby that we are not doing it alone in any way.

1.  Baby Girl is HEALTHY!  Every visit we have gone to has been nothing but good news with her.

So I hope everyone had a Happy Thanksgiving Holiday and was able to take a few minutes to think about how many things they have to be truly thanksful for this year.

Week 24 – Pregnancy. You’re doing it wrong.

Eat whatever you want.  You are eating for two!  Come on try it, for the baby.  These are phrases that I have constantly been hearing, and honestly, have been looking forward to.  For once I don’t need to worry about putting on a few extra pounds.  It is expected right?  So I have had ice cream a little more often then I ever had in my life.  I am ordering sandwiches at lunch instead of always getting the light salads.  I mean, I’m already giving up alcohol, sushi, deli meat and caffeine… I deserve to have some dessert.  Well, apparently not. 

After this last visit to the dr. office, I might be the first ever pregnant lady that is put on a diet.  Really?  I feel like I should have had to do things much more extreme than I am to have a diet be in order.  Like mac and cheese for breakfast, burger with fries and milk shake for lunch and fried chicken smothered in gravy for dinner every night.  But no – even with all the healthy things I am eating, the lack of exercise and some poor food choices I’ve made have lead to the need to count calories the week of thanksgiving no less.  I need to be at the same weight I am now on my next visit to be back on the healthy weight track.  I don’t think I can handle another visit with a Dr. looking at the weight on my chart and criticizing my size.  I can tell you, it doesn’t really instill you with confidence.

What does instill me with confidence though, is how great our sweet baby girl is doing.  She has doubled in size over the past month and looks great.   We saw a 3D sonogram that showed us her face clearly and we could see her big pouty lips and cute little nose.  She is forming into a little person, which is astonishing.  Another amazing moment this week was when Logan got to feel her move for the first time.  He laid his head on my belly and without me having to tell him when she moved he was able to feel it.  They are still small movements, but movements no less.  It is a great reminder that she is alive in there and is healthy.  Mom might not be rocking this pregnancy but baby girl sure is.  She looks beautiful and so far no problems.  I don’t think that I could ask for anything better than that. 

Week 23 – Bottles, and cribs and nipple shields, oh my!

So… these babies.  They need a lot of stuff.  It is kind of amazing how something that is less than 10 lbs could require so many things.  I realized how overwhelming it was this week when we started our registry.  I have been trying to put off registering for as long as possible, but after realizing that we are already in the holidays and my shower will be here before I know it, I thought I’d better get started. 

Not only are there tons of things on your ‘must have list’ but also the number of options in each category is unreal.  I thought I would start with something easy, bottles.  Wrong.  Everyone has an opinion on which bottle is best.  Glass vs. Plastic.  Curved vs. straight.  Liner or no liner.  Then which brand is best?  Should you get a variety to test them out?  What is worst about it is, all babies are different.  One baby might love the Dr. Brown bottle and the mom will rave about it while another one will constantly get gas because it lets in too much air. 

My friends aren’t helping either.  They all give me a different answer when I ask them about what brand they like the best.  Then just when I think I’ve got it under control on what I need and what I will never actually use, I get thrown curve balls.  Did you register for a Wubbanub?  Well, you gotta have a Wubbanub.  What the heck is a Wubbanub?  Or a bumpie?  Or nipple shields?  And why do I need all of these things?  How much of this crap that I ‘have to have’ is going to end up in a pile of stuff I never used.  What I would love to see is a mom write a blog about the things that you actually need to register for and a non-sponsored list of brands that they recommend from personal experience.  That seems to not exist yet.  And if it does and you know about it, send it my way.  All I am finding are sponsored list with paid advertisements or retail stores that have lists of things that you ‘need to have’ so that you register for more stuff.

Basically, I’m overwhelmed already and I’ve only done online shopping.  Next week Logan and I will go ‘test drive’ some strollers and actually walk into some baby stores which I have purposely avoided up until this point.  Fingers crossed we find the perfect stroller quickly and I can go back to the comfort of my computer and never step foot in another one of those stores.

But in better news, baby girl and I are feeling great.  I get to see her in another sonogram next week and have been spending the week looking forward to seeing her again.  I think my favorite part, more than actually seeing her each time, is hearing the heartbeat.  It is the most amazing sound I have ever heard and want to listen to it all the time.  Sometimes when I am thinking about her at night I can start hearing it again in my head which makes me smile.  I’ll buy this princess 50 Wubbanubs if that is what she needs, I just can’t wait to put her in my arms in a few months.

Week 22 – The Nesting Continues

This week has been such a fun week of decorating.  I feel like we were able to make a huge check mark off one item of our list.  Living room, CHECK.  We have been ordering furniture for about a month now and picking up little odds and ends from various markets, second hand shops and other home good stores and we could finally put it all together.  Perfect timing too because we would be having some friends come in town for the weekend.

Logan and I have wanted to get this room complete first before moving to the nursery.  It was the last room of the house that needed furniture.  Before now it was always referred to as the ‘yoga room’ because it was just a big empty space that we didn’t know what to do with.  Now it is a cozy media room that is prefect for unwinding after a long day.  Here are some before and after photos.  Obviously there is still some work to be done but it is a comfortable and functional space.  Most importantly, it has a recliner for Logan. 

So… I get it.  Everyone who has seen it so far has referred to it as an adult room and Logan has warned me that it isn’t kid friendly.  There are fragile antiques, light color furniture and a lot of ‘stuff’ on the tabletops.  However, this is not the kid room.  The kid room is the one with the divorce collection that while I am not going to be encouraging it, I will not be getting mad if there ends up being spilled milk, crayon, or scissor cuts on.  How long will I be able to pull this off?  Who knows?  Maybe not even a year.  But I will be enjoying it while it lasts, that’s for sure.

Now I have a little bit of time that I can soak in snuggling on the clean couch in a pretty room with my husband before baby girl comes.  This week our little girl weighs a pound.  A pound?  That is it?  Well, I sure have made her a big home to roam around in.  She can hear my voice and heartbeat.  It really makes me want to come up with her name so I can start talking to her.  Right now it is a little hard for me to comprehend that she can hear me and would benefit from hearing my voice.  I mean I remember all the long talks I had with my mom while I was in the womb…. Said no one ever.

While baby girl is hanging out and taking naps on my bladder, I have been experiencing some wicked heartburn this week.  It doesn’t matter what I eat or when I eat it, I am going to have heartburn.  And I always forget how bad it is until it comes so I am never prepared.  I need to just keep a thing of Tums in my purse but I don’t think about it until it is already too late.  It usually happens around 4:00 and goes on until I finally get home at 6:30-7 and can pop a few Tums like candy. 

Thank goodness it hasn’t really been an issue while I am going to bed.  The only issue I have when I go to bed are these crazy anxiety dreams.  I keep thinking about all the things I could forget about and neglect my poor child.  Most of them are extreme and would never happen like leaving her in the car all day because I forgot that I was driving her somewhere or just not feeding her at all for 3 days straight because I didn’t think about it.  But the truth is that even though none of these things would happen, I think the anxiety is just coming from the fear of the unknown.  So, I have been trying to spend a lot more time in prayer.  I find that the more I lift up our sweet girl and all my fears to God, the less often I have these dreams and thoughts.  I have to keep reminding myself that I cannot spend my time stressing over things that I don’t have power over and that I need to Him in control.  When I did my 30 before 30 challenge, one of my items on my list was to memorize some of my favorite bible verses.  It is amazing how those have stuck with me and pop in my head when I need them the most.  This week, my verse was Philippians 4:6.  I hope it can be as good of a reminder to you as it is for me.

Philippians 4:6

Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your request to God